Getting Organized
Disorganization, Chaos, Stress and Burnout
Or DCSB for short are common for sexual addiction clients. Patrick Carnes noticed this with his clients too. He also noticed the more disorganized his clients were the more prone they were to relapse. This is why he came up with the Personal Craziness Index to help guys in recovery understand and monitor their levels of “craziness.”
Chaos and stress can show up in different areas of your life, the backseat of your car, your weekly schedule, finances, eating habits.
If stable, long-term recovery is something you are after it can be a good idea to clean up and organize your life. Your environment matters. In the same way breathing pollutant air taxes your lungs, living in chaos and stress in your personal life erodes your recovery.
Carnes came up with twelve areas where chaos and stress can wreak havoc if we aren’t paying attention. Let’s take a look at four of them: physical health, finances, transportation, and close relationships.
What Does DCSB Look Like?
How might stress show up as it relates to your physical health? When you are stressed, how is your physical health impacted? When my stress levels are up, I usually miss work outs, don’t eat as well (or as much as I should), and I’m probably not sleeping well. These are my warning signs—like the check engine light on my dash—that something is off, that I need to look at my life and make some adjustments.
This is why it’s so important to watch your life, to pay attention to what your life is trying to tell you.
Keeping organized doesn't have to be overly complicated.
What about finances? When stress and craziness are elevated, how is your money affected? Do you spend too much? Forget to budget? Throw the budget out the window? Neglect bills? Are any of these happening right now in your life? What would it look like to organize your finances? What would that feel like?
Let’s look at the third one: transportation. When stress is raging how is your car and driving impacted? I drive faster. I’m also a more irritable driver. And it’s not uncommon that my car gets messier on the inside, gym clothes, booksWhat about you?
Lastly, relationships. How do you become with your loved ones when you’re swimming in chaos and stress? Are you present and patient? Do you discipline well? What about romantic and sweet? It’s so easy for me to become snappy, selfish, and generally no fun to be around.
Time to Clean It Up!
What would it look like to truly clean up and organize your life? How would it feel to tackle the garage, the junk drawer, get your bills in order, start using a calendar, and tidy up your living area like guests were coming?
Don’t underestimate the power of tidying up. Your environment might be a reflection of your own mind and inner world.